Richard Nicastro

Second Marriage Pitfall #1: Why second marriages are more likely to fail



Posted: Monday, November 19, 2007

by
http://www.StrengthenYourRelationship.com

Pitfall #1: You don't learn from the mistakes you made in your first marriage.  

Some important but unsettling news for those of you thinking about remarrying: More second marriages end in divorce than first marriages. And the statistics are even worse for third marriages. Intuitively, you might think the opposite would be true. After all, you're definitely older the second time around, so you've got to be wiser, too.  Right?  

Many people who enter a second marriage don't realize the specific challenges that come with remarrying. Awareness of these challenges should start with an understanding of the reasons why your first marriage ended.

Excuses like "I was too young" or "My ex was pure evil personified" are just that, excuses. You need to take a hard look at yourself to discover the reasons why your first marriage didn't survive. You may feel reluctant to explore this painful time in your life, especially when you're caught up in the pleasures of your new relationship. But this type of honest self-examination can only benefit your second marriage and lead to a more loving and lasting union.

Why is it so important to uncover the reasons your first marriage didn't work?  Simple. You're human and like everyone else walking the face of the earth, you'll repeat mistakes if you're not aware of them.  This means you'll repeat the mistakes you made in your first marriage in subsequent relationships-especially if you don't take the time and apply the effort to become truly cognizant of your relationship patterns.

So, in honor of your second marriage, ask yourself these three important questions:

How can I be a better spouse the second time around?

What types of things didn't I do in my first marriage that I should do in my second?

What types of things did I do in my first marriage that I shouldn't do in my second?

Revisiting these questions over a period of time can lead to deeper and more meaningful self-discovery. Don't forget: Self-discovery and increased intimacy go hand-in-hand.

Is your relationship worth protecting?  Are you ready to make your marriage everything it can be?

Find out how to create the relationship of your dreams: Sign up for Dr. Nicastro's free Relationship Toolbox Newsletter at www.StrengthenYourRelationship.com and immediately receive two FREE reports that will help you achieve your relationship potential. 

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a psychologist and relationship coach who is passionate about helping couples protect the sanctuary of their relationship. Rich and his wife Lucia founded LifeTalk Coaching, an internet-based coaching business that helps couples strengthen their relationships.

Dr. Richard Nicastro is co-owner of LifeTalk Coaching, an internet coaching business that works with individuals and couples to help them improve the quality of their most valued asset--their relationship. Clients can choose from several extensive programs for couples, according to their needs and goals. Rich also conducts workshops for couples on a wide range of relationship and marital issues. Recent workshops have included: Communication Skills, Keeping Intimacy Alive, Turning Conflicts into Opportunities, and Men and Intimacy.

Rich is a psychologist and relationship coach with fifteen years of experience helping couples build stronger relationships. He has supervised therapists and has taught at several universities. Visit www.StrengthenYourRelationship.com to learn more about Dr. Nicastro and LifeTalk Coaching.
This Article has been viewed 261 times. (Not updated in real-time.)
No comments yet.
We want your comments! If you can read this, you don't have javascript enabled, so you can't use this comment system. Please enable javascript.